I Will Forever Be Changed By This Experience.

Be prepared for the battle of your life! While you are an emotional basket case, he is as Cold as Ice!

While you are left holding down the fort and dealing with the real-life responsibilities, he walks away from everything leaving you to mop off his stage.

He will punish you in ways you couldn’t possibly have ever imagined and not even acknowledge it to himself!

Why? Because he is off charming the socks off of new women as if your time together didn’t even exist!

And to him it didn’t!
The Narcissist has a counterfeit heart.

Narcissists tend to make very good first impressions on others.

They are excellent actors and can fool almost anybody even trained individuals.

However they have counterfeit hearts.
Underneath their brilliant exterior lies a man that is self centred and self focused, dishonest, irresponsible, disloyal, emotionless and have no conscience.

These men live with a false sense of grandiosity and specialness and are easily found to be arrogant and deceitful.

Underneath their fake exterior is an empty fraud who seemingly is lacking a human soul.

Of course you will never see this at the beginning when you meet A Narcissistic Man.

Many women don’t see any of these awful qualities until things start getting serious because both The Narcissist and his prey tend to idolise people in the beginning of relationships.

And being idolised feels good that we often willingly overlook the red flags.

Unfortunately The Narcissist is sociopathic in that he often see himself as a victim and lacks remorse or the ability to empathise with others.

The Narcissist is a deceptive man and the most common form of his deception is his own self deception.

He truly believes he is perfectly innocent of having committed anything wrong.

He holds himself completely blameless for any part in your breakdown.

Don’t hold your breath waiting for an apology from this man or even an admittance on his part of being partially to blame for anything.

He believes he has done nothing wrong as he is just so wonderful!

The Narcissist doesn’t care about your problems or your feelings.

He has absolutely no regard or respect for anyone’s feelings.

He has no empathy and is never above taking advantage of others for his own personal gain.

He is constantly hungry for praise and he will go on a feeding frenzy for the adoration and admiration he desperately seeks with every individual he comes in contact with.

He is a legend in his own mind and deeply living in a fantasy world built on his own imagined self importance.

The Narcissist can neither give nor receive love, he can’t empathise with the pain and suffering of others.

Although he is often incredibly charming and draws many people into his enchanted circle, The Narcissist is incapable of true intimacy.

At the core of his life experience The Narcissist has emotionally and often financially harmed so many.

He has treated others with cruelty, ruthlessness and indifference too many times.

Ultimately in the depth of his unconsciousness he knows that he is an empty fraud.

Nothing can be more painful than being discarded by A Narcissistic Man.

If you are about to become his next victim then be aware of his soon to come character assassin of you.

Narcissistic Men holds an actor’s award, they will say just about anything about another in order to protect their perfect ‘image’.

Whether or not this has happened to you, it is still a very painful realisation when you come to discover that you meant absolutely nothing to someone you loved deeply.

The realisation that this man never loved you hurts beyond reason.

It is hard to understand that A Narcissist loves only himself and if anything considered you more as a love-rival than a lover.

He was with you for the benefits.
His benefits could have been something as simple as getting his needy ego stroked, being taken care of financially or maybe it was something more like status or opportunity.

Whatever his benefits, being loved by you or being in an intimate relationship with you meant nothing to him.

You will find that you have changed during the course of the time with The Narcissist.

You will walk away completely far removed from the beautiful woman you were when you met him.

You may have gone from soft, sweet and feminine to hardened and bitter.

From trusting, open and receptive to suspicious and untrusting.

From self assured and confident to being full of self doubt and insecurities.

It will take a lot of hard work to let this damaged part of you go and find your old self again.

A Narcissist has a callous disregard for you.
For most of us the experience can leave us feeling confused, devastated and untrusting.

A Narcissist walks away from you with a cold and a callous disregard ,, he feels nothing.

A Narcissist will avoid looking at you even if you are sitting right in front of him.

This is his way of dismissing and devaluing you.

All Narcissists do this and of course there is nothing about these actions that are normal but your mind can’t conceive this and so it tries to understand.

However there is no making sense of the senseless.

A Narcissist will turn from loving you to discarding you almost abruptly as it took for him to idolise you after he first met you.

Abuse is an integral and inseparable part of The Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

The Narcissist idealises, devalues and discards the object of his initial idealisation.

This abrupt and heartless devaluation IS abuse.

ALL Narcissists idealise and then devalue. This is THE core of Pathological Narcissism.

The Narcissist exploits, lies, insults, demeans, ignores, manipulates and controls.

The Narcissist has to be number one, the centre of attention, the big cheese and the main attraction.

If he is in a situation where he fears not getting the adulation that he feels he deserves such as with your friends or coworkers, he will be extremely uncomfortable either claiming a headache, feeling bad vibes in the place or simply getting angry.

He may insult or dismiss everyone there as substandard human beings.

A Narcissist can’t share his limelight with anyone not even his children.

It is especially hard to let go when you can’t find any rhyme or reason to the way it all unfolded.

We think that all people are good people and can’t understand how someone could so easily just dismiss us as if we never existed.

Truth is we didn’t exist to The Narcissist.

He is so totally and completely self centred to the point of him being the only person in his life.

We simply a temporary ego boost.
A Narcissist Supplier, an enforcer and validation of his self love.

You were taken in by his phony charm simply because you trusted him and now you are left with doubts, insecurities, questions and extreme hurt that someone you cared for could so easily dismiss you and then walk away completely unmoved and untouched by the experience.

You want him to hurt too, to show sorrow and to feel remorse so that you can feel like you mattered ,, but you didn’t.

And it has nothing to do with you.
He simply is unable to care for anyone other than himself no matter what.

And deep inside you know that you have just wasted months or years of your life on someone who is an empty fraud.

It’s like you imagined everything and nothing was real.

He was a masterful actor when he was getting his ego fed but now that he is not getting his narcissistic supply from you anymore he has totally erased you from his life.

It is important to remember that Narcissists are plotters and he has been plotting the destruction since the very first moment his charming but fake persona met you.

Expect your world to fall apart whereas his world will remain unscathed as will his emotions.

Narcissistic Men don’t have empathy for others and will never take any direct responsibility for any pain they may have caused.

They will never acknowledge their wrongdoings or apologise because they truly believe themselves to be perfect.

They project all their faults and flaws onto you, accusing you of the very things that they themselves are guilty of.

In fact you probably were made to believe that you were the problem when in actuality it was his narcissism that was at fault.

You have subconsciously learnt to take his attacks personally because he is so very good at manipulating the people around him.

Narcissistic Men play on the fact that most of us are trusting and forgiving and that we want to believe in them.

Narcissists are all about their image and they spend an inordinate amount of time perfecting their false front or their image.

He is forever aware of his impression on people and he knows exactly what face to put on to draw people into his magical circle of followers with the intent to enhance his own self exaltation.

Whatever his career, special talent or gift may be he will spend days, weeks, months and even years perfecting it.

Perfecting his persona for the sole purpose of gaining admiration is the only thing he holds important and the only reward he needs.

He is an expert of even fooling himself into thinking that he is larger than life and unfortunately the more positive the feedback he receives the more trapped in his mirror he becomes.

He would rather have adoration from complete strangers than a deep meaningful relationship with a loving person.

His image is superficial and covers up his complete lack of inner awareness.

He is quite simply an expert fake forever on the search for a true acceptance but never daring enough to show his real self fearing of not receiving it.

The sad thing is because he feels loved for his fake front he never truly feels loved for his real self and this further enables and encourages his Narcissism.

The Narcissistic Man displays many typical psychopathic characteristics.

He may have falsely displayed deep emotion towards you when he was in your good grace.

In the romance department, A Narcissist has an uncanny ability to gain your trust and affection quickly, disarming you with his charm and captivating you with his many grandiose plans.

You will be left deeply confused and weakened by the abuse.

He is not above committing destructive acts.
When it all becomes a reality, it is likely that his false persona will completely disappear all together and you will most likely experience the most hurtful behaviour from him.

In the end I was left feeling like a shell of a person.

I will forever be changed by this experience.
He met me when I was on top of the world.
By the time he was done I had lost almost everything.

The best thing that has ever happened to me was the day the sociopath left.

The day I started working on myself and forgetting about him and the mess he left for me to clean up.

I decided it was time to invest in me.
I developed my own fix myself course.
I took some online courses on Meditation and Self Love which were great.

I just started doing little things everyday that made me feel good even if it was as simple has a face mask.

If it made me feel good I did it and slowly it started to work.

Self love and heal yourself back to to who you once were.

3 Comments

  • Ganito ganito sya lahat ng naisulat mo tugmang tugma para sa dati ko kapartner sa buhay.nagsama kami sa loob ng 16 yrs. nakaraan taon ko lang nalaman ang tungkol sa ganitong uri ng personalidad ng isang tao.akala ko magbabago pa sya At umaasa na mgbabago pa.meron kaming 2 anak isang 12 yrs old at isang 1 yrs old.8 na buwan na lumipas ng iwanan nya kami.hindi ko na sya hinabol o pinakiusapan na wag kaming iwanan.simula ng nagbabasa ako ng ganito uri ng personalidad naintindihan ko na.hindi na talaga sya magbabago.pinag aral ko sya tinulungan na iangat ang buhay namin.pero nung nagkaroon na sya ng maayos na trabaho at napromote nakalimutan na nya na Meron syang pamilya.mas gusto nya pa ilibre ung ibang Tao kesa sa amin.iba ang ugali nya sa labas ng bahay Samantala dito sa loob ng bahay namin parati syang galit o kya madalas walang kibo sa aming mag iina.madalas din nya ako sinisiraan sa mga katrabho nya.ung personal namin problema bilang mag asawa madalas nya kikwento sa mga katrabho nya.pati ung personal na gingawa ng mag asawa ikikwento nya rin Sa ex girlfriend nya.iniwanan nya kaming dahil sa nagkabalikan na sila ng ex nya Meron na pamilya at Meron 2 anak.wala na sya pakielam kung Meron nasasaktan ni minsan hindi sya huminge ng kapatawaran sa aming kahit alam nya sobra nya kami nasaktan.ni minsan din hindi nya kinamusta ang mga anak namin.minsan nagkasalubong sila ng anak ko panganay wala sya ginawa.ni hindi nya man lang kinausap ang anak namin o pinansin man lang.nasa isang lugar lang kami nakatira sa ngayon.sobrang hirap ng pinagdadaanan namin at wala syang pakielam duon.ang pinansyal suporta nya sa mga bata At sobrang liit.sapilitan pa ang pagbigay gusto nya lagi namamalimos sa knya hindi sya kusang ngbibigay sa amin lagi Kailangan sabihan sya o kya hingan sya ng anak ko panganay.sa ngayon ng under ako ng physiological exam dahil ngfile ako ng kaso laban sa kanya sa sobrang pagpapahirap nya sa aming mag iina.sana manalo.isama nyo po kami sa mga dasal nyo na sana ma bigyan kami ng hustisya laban sa taong umabuso sa aming kahinaan.maraming salamat po pagpalain nawa tayo ng Maykapal..

  • I saved it to keep reading it.
    This is so true & astonishingly spot on.
    I can’t wait for ur book ❤️

    • Thank you Hana for your wonderful words.
      The book is taking a bit longer than expected but hopefully by January 2019 it will be ready ❤️

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