Narcissists VS Survivors.
I don’t think life is ‘fair’ in general.
A high functioning Narcissist can manage to live off by sucking the life of one supply after another and procuring new Flying Monkeys as he gets bored or irritated by the old.
Because this is his game and his survival depends on mastering it.
While an honest, trusting and sensitive Victim can be turned by the effects of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder into a non trusting, insecure and isolated person not able to rebuild social connections.
After years of isolation, continuous distrust and insecurity, followed by an effective Smear Campaign most likely she will have no one left except one or two close family members, if lucky.
It is great to see how many Victims write and support each other but in everyday’s life they are more likely to be met with disbelief when sharing A Narcissistic Traumatic experience.
Because people do not know, there is just not enough awareness unless perhaps you are speaking about outright, evident Physical Abuse.
So I think that while A Narcissist might feel empty or unfulfilled for his whole life, if he’s high functioning enough he can still easily manage to fool others and don’t let the mask slip off.
Or better said the general lack of awareness or knowledge about the disorder and its effects on others lets him get away with it.
He is well equipped to play a role and will keep playing it until he finds someone to fall for it and since he can mimic others perfectly more often than not there will always be a next Victim.
He will always find an excuse to those around him to explain how He is The Victim and not the real Predator.
A Narcissist lacks a few key ingredients which prevents him from emerging from his altered state of reality.
Among these ingredients is humility.
Without humility there can be no growth.
Humility allows us the freedom to accept responsibility for our errors and learn from our mistakes.
A Narcissist also lacks the ability to self reflect.
His defences blocks him from integrating both positive and negative balanced experiences.
A Narcissist is Envious.
Rather than learning from those who can model successful behaviour, A Narcissist tend to devalue these sources and view them with disdain.
Not being capable of learning from past experiences, A Narcissist is programmed to project blame and repeat self defeating behaviours.
Victims can tolerate the emotional pain associated with insight.
A Victim is prone to assume responsibility for failures in her judgement.
She can accept her flaws and has the humility to transcend her resentments.
Victims are motivated to learn from past mistakes and they tend to reach out for emotional support.
They process their frustrations and tend to be empathetic in their relationships.
Victims appreciate the good in people and tend to be less aggressive than Narcissists.
This softer side includes being a good listener and lending a hand when necessary.
The qualities that are necessary for long lasting and meaningful relationships are found more frequently in Survivors than in Perpetrators.