Realising That He Was A Two Faced Narcissist..
I realised the duplicitousness when I looked back over the entire time he was in my life.
After knowing who he truly was everything just fell into place.
All of the lies and manipulation were instantly revealed and made sense.
He revealed himself many times prior to me learning about Narcissism but I couldn’t see it.
He would lie, manipulate, gaslight and triangulate on a regular basis and I was unaware at this time.
He was always off as if hiding something.
Nothing about him ever felt right.
When I saw right through him at that moment I NEVER looked back.
I had to learn how to heal, to love and to be myself again.
I often see people saying seek revenge but that will only make you Abusive like him.
Narcissists who have severe symptoms can’t heal and because they can’t heal they can’t move on with their lives hence their continuous cycles of destruction.
There is no revenge in playing someone like that at his own games because it means you have to get in the swamp with the rats.
This may sound derogatory and maybe it is but that is how I describe it to add meaning.
You don’t punish An Abuser by being one.
You punish him by being able to make the right decisions.
By being able to truly be yourself and not being sad, unstable and destructive like him.
There is a saying,
Kill them with kindness
You don’t need to get revenge.
You need to focus on what makes you great again.
Don’t pretend to be great but be actually the best possible version of yourself.
Then offer humility, acceptance, kindness and forgiveness to your Abuser whilst being able to remain disconnected.
You don’t need the last word.
You don’t need to play games.
Just the fact that you are real and him sensing your authenticity is enough to break him down from the inside.
Don’t be ruled by malice and hate.
Don’t be defined by negativity and manipulation.
It may take some time to build yourself back up again but with time you will be yourself again.
Why be anyone else?
Why the need to change?
Be true to your core.
That should annoy the hell out of him in the most kindest and purest way!
Every Abuser hates to see you smiling genuinely after spending months if not years being abused and exude real authentic awareness and self acceptance.
Now that is bravery.
That is courage.
That is being real.
Be yourself because you can.
And that is your gift.