The Covert Narcissist.
A Covert Narcissist tends to be very conventional and so he behaves as appropriately as he can be.
He’s the one who doesn’t discard his spouse but nevertheless criticise, undermine, demand, expect, drain and enslave.
He withholds compliments, appreciation, validation, acknowledgement, support, affection, love and dismisses people’s opinions, needs, preferences, requests, self-esteem and success.
He’s connected to organisations that are believed to be virtuous, honourable, charitable and admirable.
He contributes little to nothing to these organisations but simply shows up and mentions his membership in such organisations during any conversation.
He uses the we pronoun to imply that he participated in some benevolent gesture, when in fact he never even thought of the gesture let alone participated in bringing it to fruition.
He is very passive aggressive.
He will agree to do something which he has no intention of doing.
When confronted, he will appear to agree or concede but he will never do what he has promised.
He has a million excuse, all lame, he is sneaky, he lies, he digs in his heels and do exactly what he wants to do and nothing else.
You can’t win with him because he diffuses you by agreeing humbly but not complying.
He criticises people behind their backs unless the person is clearly in a position of weakness and then he hammers that person down.
He’s like a mean older sibling to his children and finds them to be annoying, a nuisance and a diversion from his spouse’s undivided attention.
Most people find this type of A Narcissist to be a decent person which is exactly what he wants.
That is the mask he wears.
Some people may get the impression that The Covert Narcissist is simply a little odd, rigid, conventional, lacks empathy and is boring.
He also doesn’t relate well to others, isn’t particularly interested in others as is evident by his inability to recall anything about the other person’s life and lacks insight and initiative.
No one ever suspects that he is abusive, selfish, immature, incompetent, a taker, arrogant and a self righteous Narcissist.
The Covert Narcissist is all of those things.