The Narcissist’s Defence Mechanism Following All The Lying!!
A Narcissist lack objective constancy.
His only truth is the convenient one that works for him in the moment.
I like to refer to The Narcissist’s coping mechanism as The Triple D Trifecta.
First he will deny and that’s easy for him to do.
Press him and he will distort the truth.
Press him even further and he will deflect leading to projection, gaslighting or any other tactics of blame-shifting he feels appropriate.
Going deeper into A Narcissist’s mentality we see that A Narcissist lacks objective consistency which doesn’t allow him to see the big picture or link events together.
This is a fundamental development milestone that occurs between the age of 2–3.
He lives impulsively from moment to moment akin to a toddler’s attention span.
Unlike a developing child, we see cognitive dissonance stem from here where The Narcissist actions don’t follow his words.
To the healthy-minded person A Narcissist is constantly contradicting himself but The Narcissist doesn’t see it this way.
He hates being nitpicked because events never have a way of linking together to him.
His way of thinking is whatever happens in the moment is how he bases his behaviour.
He never zooms out to look at the bigger picture.
Interesting to note is this is where he inadvertently garners control over you and supply from you.
Therefore by that very logic he is not lying.
He is telling the truth that works in the moment.
Trouble is that he lacks constancy.
So from moment to moment a healthy person see him as a liar but he doesn’t.
This then is why he has to deny, distort, deflect, gaslight, project and blame-shift.
This is how he feels he can defend himself.
This is his sad toolbox of unhealthy tools.
Generally speaking the logical will never understand the illogical.
However get in The Narcissist’s head to get ahead.