The Various Tactics Used By A Narcissist!!
Gaslighting, triangulation, lies, blame shift, love bombing are all the usual suspects.
He uses these methods and ploys for the whole picture, his entire way of being ,, his life.
It creates chaos.
It creates confusion.
It causes us to let our guard down.
It causes us Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
It causes us to fight or flight.
It creates trust, loyalty, love and sympathy all at once which he then uses against us because we will be in a trusting state when he drops his mask and he always does.
The gaslighting is done to confuse you.
To make you believe his lies.
To make you mistrust yourself and it’s also a self defence.
He can gaslight to cover up his lies and therefore defends himself.
He can twist the truth in order to turn the focus away from him and back onto you which benefits him since the focus is no longer on him.
He is proactive and doesn’t need to defend himself since he is pulling all the cards.
We are always on defence mode.
It’s us who needs to defend ourselves.
We will regret if we thought of bringing up anything he did wrong.
He will make sure of this.
The hell we will pay for weeks later isn’t worth the sin he committed.
We will find ourselves excusing cheating because we caused it and it’s all our fault.
The tactics he uses has many reasons behind it.
It serves many purposes all at once.
He doesn’t defend himself the way we do.
If he does truly get painted into a corner, he will yell at us to create our fight or flight to kick in.
He will change the subject going back to his old standby insult of us and then we can’t think straight so it changes our focus from accusing him to now having to defend ourselves.
He may also walk out the door pretending to be so angry.
He doesn’t need to defend himself.
He has everything under his control because it’s all a calculated set up.
We are the ones who must defend ourselves.
And when we believe that he also does then we are projecting.
Self defence would mean that he actually cares but he doesn’t.