When We Stumble Upon The Word “Narcissist”.
It’s so hard to admit that we are being abused when it’s happening and sometimes it takes the word Narcissism to flip the switch for us to see it finally.
I don’t know why it takes stumbling upon the word Narcissist before we admit we were being abused.
I believe that stumbling upon the word helps us understand WHY we were abused.
We were abused because we were in some sort of a toxic rollercoaster and we wanted to make sense of it.
For me I kind of knew I was being abused.
So it is difficult when it’s happening because we don’t know why it’s happening.
We either want peace and tranquility OR closure!
Victims of Narcissistic Abuse get neither from The Narcissist and honestly from what I have read, rarely if ever do.
We then research and research and research.
We Google all of the behaviours, the abuse and the pathological lying.
What pops up ,, Narcissism.
Now we have a cornerstone to dig deeper and read other people’s experiences.
Then it hits us.
It is all as clear as the daylight.
We have been involved with someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
What also hits us is the fact that there is no real treatment, no cure and really no hope.
This hopefully leads us to fixing ourselves because the rollercoaster no matter what kind of relationship it is with A Narcissist can never be fixed.
Now we try to take our focus off of The Narcissist.
The hope for finding closure from him we know will never materialise and we focus on getting our heart, mind and soul back intact.
We start repairing the weeks, months or years of The Trauma Bonding.
We fight and scratch until we have our lives back and when we get there we know we have learnt a very difficult life lesson.
This lesson is ,, Some people are just evil and we need to have boundaries to protect ourselves from them.
I have actually thanked The Narcissist for giving me this life lesson.
I‘m a stronger person now thanks to him.
He will go through life in a cycle of Hell and I have achieved personal Victory.
He broke me down so many times in ways no one can ever endure and left me alone so many times in the dark trying to put myself back together.
I did it on my own and I still am everyday.
It is tough but now I know what to look out for.
Now I know what I want and what I simply won’t accept from any other person.
I learnt to speak up and stand up for myself.
I learnt all this because of what he did to me, in his mission to destroy me he actually unintentionally taught me how to be stronger.