When You Stop Chasing The Narcissist?!
It is not wise to purposely much less quickly make a Narcissist doubt himself.
Something which enrages him.
It only lasts a second anyway before he realises every reason he has to hate you.
It’s not that he thinks he may have done something to cause it; instead he will be convinced you will have used him or something just as vile.
For this, you will be black listed, tarred and feathered to anyone who even remotely knows you or possibly could!
Once the Narcissist begins this attack on your character making sure the entire world knows what you did to make him cast you aside.
Instead, despite any following shows of friendship or kindness you may extend mistaken as manipulations by now, he will keep the character assassination up because, actually, it was going to happen sooner or later and the sooner it begins the more pity the Narcissist will gain from others for allowing himself to be used and abused by you.
It’s a win win for him, but not for you.
Everything is an opportunity for the Narcissist.
Your role will change in whatever way suits them.
They are very convincing.
So calm and so casual, any emotion from you proves you are as insane and manipulative as they said you are.
It’s not easy.
The sooner you move on and find a whole new group of friends the better and the faster you will get over it.
Trying to defend yourself from everyone who pities the Narcissist now will only cause you to lose more as everything you do will be misconstrued to be something else.
It is a sad state of affairs which generally leads to finding very good and wise friends once we stop taking anything the Narcissist does personally or hoping the truth will be believed by anyone.
Things seem to work a bit backwards for a Narcissist.
If you chase A Narcissist he is more likely to keep running away because they are getting attention from your chase.
A Narcissist sees anybody who has a regular and consistent interaction with them on the Narcissist’s home territory as “chasing” them.
You can “chase” a Narcissist for years and have no idea that you were “chasing” them.
You thought you were just in the same place they were.
A Narcissist will invite you to come to where they are and then give you the Silent Treatment for the APPEARANCE of being “chased” by you.
An interesting thing happens when you stop giving a Narcissist the APPEARANCE of being “chased“.
The Narcissist starts chasing your attention.
The ONLY way a Narcissist considers you to NOT be “chasing” them is if you stay TOTALLY away from them, TOTALLY away from ANY place they go, and TOTALLY away from ANY person they know or are connected to in any way.
To stop giving the appearance of “chasing” a Narcissist is hard to do.
To stop a Narcissist from “chasing” you for NOT “chasing” them is next to impossible.
Narcissists love being “chased” to be given ATTENTION, but they hate having to “chase” to be given ATTENTION.
If you “stop chasing” a Narcissist and ignore them when they “chase” you, the Narcissist will react with extreme anger, vindictive hate, and total devaluation.
Narcissists are desperate to keep you on the hook.
I think the only way to combat this is to read the medical literature on Narcissism, and to realise that these people are close to being sociopathic.
Sociopathy and Psychopathy are like brother and sister pathologies, and Narcissism is the first cousin.
Cut the Narcissist out of your life and leave him to the medical establishment.