Why Closure Doesn’t Really Matter!!
I may have gone a little too far with closure lately.
I have always been good at letting things go and not asking why because I didn’t want to look so desperate.
Because I have always been told that I shouldn’t ask too many questions when it comes to someone else’s feelings.
But I’m just not wired that way.
I want to know everything when it comes to someone else’s feelings especially if I’m in the equation.
I deserve answers.
I deserve to know why.
I learnt that at the end of the day whether we get a closure or not, the outcome will still be the same.
It won’t change their mind or their heart.
They made that decision long before taking it.
They made that decision long before they even talk to us about it.
And that is when I realised that those who fail to give me closure are those who are still looking for closure themselves.
They are confused.
They are lost.
They are still trying to win an ex back.
They still want to date someone who fulfils their fantasies.
They are concerned about something else or someone else.
They are distracted.
They are not thinking clearly.
They don’t see things the way we see it, because they are still engrossed in some unfinished business from their past.
They will fail to give us what we are looking for in a relationship and they will fail to give us closure.
This is when I learnt that even if we get our closure it won’t make any difference, because the one giving it to us is already lost.
Their answers won’t help us or give us the realisation we are looking for.
Their answers won’t make any sense to us because it won’t even make sense to them.
Their answers is just a way to make us feel better and make them feel less guilty about abandoning something that could have been great.
Their answers says nothing about us.
So while it feels better to get a closure it won’t make any difference.
Because it will never be honest, genuine or realistic.
It won’t make easier to move on.
I think we only obsess about getting a closure because it wasn’t our decision.
We don’t really need a closure.
We don’t need an apology from someone who gave up on us.
We don’t need someone to pinpoint to us why we are not right for them.
We don’t need to hear lies from someone who wasn’t invested enough to stay and work things out.
We don’t need someone else measuring our worth and making us feel like we will never get it right.
We don’t need a closure.
we don’t need someone who isn’t strong enough to love us.
We only need to close some doors once and for all.