Why Do Narcissists Gaslight Their Victims?
The controlling manipulative brain numbing tactic of gaslighting is an intentional behaviour by The Abuser.
It creates utter confusion and chaos in the victim’s mind.
With the unpredictable actions, calculated lying and intermittent punishing by The Narcissistic Abuser, the victim’s sense of reality becomes completely distorted.
This mind twisting process put the victim on an unhealthy footing that every move, every thought and every choice of the victim is questioned.
It is one way The Abusive Narcissism exerts control over the victim.
This is when we start feeling like we are going crazy.
One must experience it to truly understand the crazy making that occurs with the gaslighting.
Narcissists lacks empathy and they don’t have a conscience.
A Narcissist has a completely distorted sense of what is right and what is wrong.
If he is able to do or say whatever he wants, whenever he wants without consequences then he is in an ideal situation because he can continue to justify and control it all without any accountability.
The victim starts apologising for things that are clearly not her/his fault.
We are so thoroughly confused and brainwashed that we find ourselves defending, minimising and making excuses for actions and intentional behaviours on the part of The Abuser that are inexcusable.
The relentless blaming, lack of responsibility, insults and abuse with the uncontrollable anger will be unleashed on us if we dare to defend ourselves or disagree on the fabricated facts of The Narcissist.
The Narcissistic Abuser shames us, blames us and insists that what we saw, heard and experienced did NOT HAPPEN.
So we start questioning our sanity.
It is complete torture.
If there are no witnesses to the madness, we really start to think that we are the bad ones.
We will blame ourselves, reprimand ourselves and continue to try harder and act better.
Many times victims including myself turn timid, silent and filled with anxiety and fear.
We are literally confused into compliance and acceptance of what we know is clearly not right.
We are trapped in a fog where our vision is so clouded and our sense of who we are is completely distorted.
We no longer trust ourselves or our sense of what is right.
Our thinking becomes skewed.
we find ourselves trapped in a false reality that is being represented as the truth and find ourselves making excuses, defending and trying to explain the actions of the very person who is actually deceiving us.
Our compass that is supposed to guide us is completely off.
We no longer have our own opinions, can’t define our emotional needs and have lost our sense of who we are at the core also our integrity and beliefs are no longer solid.
But the compass can be restored and You can come out of the fog.
You just have to believe in yourself again and take one small step at a time.