You Have To Feel It To Heal It.
I have spent a lot of my life time resisting my true feelings.
Anger made me feel wrong.
Sadness made me feel weak.
Needy made me feel girly.
Love made me feel scared.
I became an expert at hiding when I was feeling any of the above.
I used to numb my feelings by being control.
Maintaining iron-will control over my every emotion.
I don’t think that I had anyone fooled.
Besides, this only works for so long before the emotions leak out and erupt like a dormant volcano.
You have to feel it to heal it.
As someone who absolutely hates feeling anything that makes me vulnerable, this was the best advice I have ever received.
Because I have felt no greater pain and sadness than I have in the past three years of my life.
Yet it’s been the catalyst for my greatest transformation.
Every crazy and unhealthy thing we do in life has a catalyst.
Something that triggers the event that lands us in the place we never thought we would ever be.
It could be the death of a loved one.
The memory of some childhood trauma.
The meeting of another soul who holds a mirror up to us and forces us to see what we don’t want.
We are here because we can’t face the real pain that lies beneath it so we look for ways to escape it, but the only way out is in.
Into the feelings, the pain, the hurt and the loneliness because there’s no other way.
Believe me I have tried.
I have tried every other way around it and I’m here to tell you that there is none.
You have to feel it all to heal it, pass through it and get to the other side.
Forgive yourself for being scared and just feel it and be ok with feeling scared and alone.
I noticed recently that I have been repressing a lot of emotions.
I’m ashamed of it because I feel it should be gone by now.
Sadness, grief, loneliness, neediness, wanting, longing and shame but the more I try to hide those feelings, the stronger it came up.
So I gave it a voice and I allowed it out.
I knew that by releasing it, it won’t linger or stick around longer than I needed it to.
I just felt it and gave it the space to be released so I could pass through it.
I allowed my pain to do the healing by acknowledging that it’s there.
Yes, I’m still sad and I’m still grieving.
I feel lonely and in need of love.
But those feelings no longer have power over me because I’m feeling it now instead of repressing it, numbing it or trying to control it.
Every feeling we have has something to teach us about ourselves and is an opportunity to heal our broken hearts on a deeper level.
So don’t repress your feelings and yourself to feel everything.
Don’t judge yourself and show yourself compassion for the imperfect yet perfect journey you are on.
This healing journey is leading you to somewhere great ,, to your greatest transformation.
Whenever you feel that the pain is too deep to endure, remind yourself that you have to feel it to heal it.